The Theory of the Dipper and the Bucket

Extracted from “How full is your bucket?” by Tom Rath and Donald Clifton (2004) Gallup Press, New York.

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We are all certain to face major challenges as we progress through our lives.  Often we feel that if we were dealt a bad hand, and that life is unfair.  But we don’t have to allow ourselves to be defined by our hardships.  Our responses to difficult events and our emotional state are much more important.  Continual reinforcement about our strengths can buffer us against getting overwhelmed with the negative.  And understanding what we do best allows us not only to survive, but grow and thrive in the face of diversity.

 

Page 5 - The Theory of the Dipper and the Bucket

Each of us has an invisible bucket.  It is constantly emptied or filled, depending on what others say or do to us.  When our bucket is filled, we feel great.  When it is empty, we feel awful.

Each of us has an invisible dipper.  When we use that dipper to fill other people’s buckets – by saying or doing things to increase their positive emotions – we also fill our own bucket.  But when we use that dipper to dip from other’s buckets – by saying or doing things that decrease their positive emotions – we diminish ourselves.

Like the cup that runneth over, a full bucket gives us a positive outlook and renewed energy.  Every drop in that bucket makes us stronger and more optimistic.

But an empty bucket poisons our outlook, saps our energy and undermines our wills.  That’s why every time, someone dips from our bucket, it hurts us.

So we face a choice every moment of every day.

We can fill one other’s buckets or we can dip from them.  It’s an important choice – one that profoundly influences our relationships, productivity, health and happiness.